Santa Signs Legislation To Help Special-Wants Children
December 14, 2005 Issue 41•50
NORTH POLE—Kristofer Kringle, an international toy distributor popularly known as "Santa Claus," approved elf-penned legislation Monday that grants greater benefits to often-neglected "special wants" children. "Old policies failed to reward the world's children for dreaming big, but no longer—children with special or unusual wants shall see them all fulfilled on Christmas morning," Kringle said, in an announcement met with strong support from parents of the developmentally entitled. "My children were all born with special wants," said Glenda Froman, mother of three. "After years of whiny suffering, they'll finally have their wish: Xbox 360s in every room, matching ponies, and a rocket-powered bicycle they're allowed to fly inside the house."
10 comments:
And people wonder whats wrong with kids these day.... no respect... no self control... no discipline.... mouthy, spoiled, punk kids. Makes me wanna rip my hair out sometimes.
Or rip their hair out :D
Now Paul...let's not overgeneralize all kids. There are a lot of good, hardworking, respectable kids out there too.
But with that said, I'd definitely recommend ripping their hair out as opposed to your own. Much less painful. :)
Now let's not get bitter and start kid bashing. :) This was meant to be a satirical reminder to encourage us to remember the real reason for Christmas.
I'll reiterate: There are a lot of good kids out there.
Instead of despairing, let's make an effort to pat the good ones on the back. To let the well behaved kids know that we notice and appreciate it. Let's make an effort to let the parents, who are trying hard to raise a Christian child in a non-Christian world, know that we appreciate their efforts.
I'm not sorry.
I said it half in jest and half serious.
And I'll stand by my frustration.
I'm not staying there are not good kids, just that some of them should get coal for Christmas.
Side note- luke... I think you were "overgeneralizing" my comment..... oh, ya and "I'm making an effort to pat luke on the back, for being a good kid"
:O
Oops... did I type that out loud?
*Humor and sarcasm is so hard to type*
You know I love ya luke
KrisT: what??
Will: Thanks for lightening it up around here...I was starting to sweat. ;)
Is Santa real and would he really deliver pink underwear to Will?? That makes me sweat.
Ah, the joys of being an uncle. Can send the little ones away when I get sick of em. :-)
Pink undies Will? If I was you I would not admit you have em.
I think this convo has turned inappropriate. Nobody should have to think of Will getting pink underwear. That is just wrong. :)
You all have a Merry Christmas!
Satire? Standard Achievment Test + ire? What?
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